Saturday, September 25, 2010

Today was a bad day... but we knew there would be bad days.

Today was a bad day. It was hard, overwhelming, and discouraging.

We started off with the Hospice Care Nurse coming in for an evaluation and basic physical. What we thought would be about 45 minutes to an hour really turned into over 4 hours. Grandma's condition is much worse than it was a year ago. Her blood pressure is dangerously high. the problem with this is that it could cause a stroke. That would make her life so miserable.

Her lips are a dark purple. She does not get nearly enough oxygen. They delivered a full oxygen system this afternoon that they want her to use full time. Grandpa and I are going to try it a nights to start with and see if Grandma will leave it on her face. Grandpa would rather she have quality of life over quantity of life, and I can't say I disagree. That is certainly what I would choose.

The bed we have had for her for this past week was way too high. They delivered a new hospital bed this afternoon. (By the way, I am quite impressed with the Hospice program. The nurse left us around 2:00 p.m. and the new bed was at our house by 4:40 p.m. Impressive!) When the nurse said it was a necessity, I looked to grandpa Bodell and asked him if he was okay with that. I knew that his greatest joy each day was morning snuggles with grandma. He put on a "brave face" and said, "Hey, if that is what it takes, then we will make it work." But, I knew he was really disappointed.

I asked the nurse to tell us why, in detail, we needed a hospital bed. She explained that grandma is not getting enough oxygen laying down flat each night. Grandma needs to be on an incline. Grandpa has been a very good sport and we are giving it a try. Bill went over to our old house and got our single bed that Brighton used to use for grandpa to sleep on. We will see how that works. Both beds are snug up next to each other, so that they can snuggle all night. Grandma's bed lifts and lowers to help us get her into bed easier.

Grandma has spilled her drink every day for the past 3 days. Today, I finally got smart and started using a cup with a lid and a straw for her. She is very much like a special needs 2-year old. And heaven knows I know how to deal with that! :)

Grandma will not swallow her pills. I don't know what to do about it. I am going to try to mash them up in her food tomorrow. It took Bill and I almost one hour tonight to get grandma into bed, and to swallow her pills. We finally gave up. There was no way she was going to swallow ANYTHING! Not water, not anything! She was VERY determined.

She also refused, REFUSED, refused to help us get her to stand up. For the past 3 days, she has been great, but then all of a sudden, NO MORE! She would not do anything at all. Thank heavens Billy was there to lift her like a rag doll... but I have no idea what I will do when he is not around. I also worry about his back. Let's hope these "bad days" are few and far between.

But on the plus side... I have my grandma Bodell in my house! It is an amazing feeling that she is just downstairs. I love her so much I get giddy in my stomach when I think of it! I am so lucky and blessed to have her under our roof! And I can't even begin to talk about Grandpa tonight, because my emotions are very close to the surface, and I have cried hard already today, just being honored to be among this great man. I hope to be able to write more about him tomorrow.

I don't know if I got everything, but I am exhausted, so i will hope to write more tomorrow.
I love Maydene Brown Bodell so much. She is one of the greatest examples of my life!

Love,
Charise

6 comments:

  1. Thanks for writing this. It is good to hear how they are doing even if it isn't the good stuff. I think it is good for all of us to see how Grandpa deals with his struggles in life. You are amazing and I love you!

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  3. I'm here and I'm reading. Yes, we knew it would be hard. Dixie has been exactly there for months. I wish we could give you all that we have learned and experienced over the past years, and had you take them for a few days at Dixie's before we moved them. Most of those details we have dealt with over the past 3 years. Did Dixie leave you her sippy cups? That is all she has used for years. Also she always pulled off the oxygen that is why we took her off. She hated it! But I understand that hospice needs to cover themselves also. I would try for a few days but if not have Dad sign whatever to not have her have to keep that on. All that you say is new to you but repeat to us. We have made the best decisions we could along the way, from taking her off oxygen to taking her off many of the pills she was on. Thank you for trying it. We hope it works. You are an amazing grand daughter and we love you.

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  4. thanks for the info/updates. the more informed we all are, the better to prepare for the future. You are doing a great work with which you will receive many blessings. including the blessing of spending their last few years with them.

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  5. You are such a sweetheart! Your kids did great at preparing you for this!

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  6. Thanks for the update. Can't wait to hear the post about grandpa!

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